Vladimir Putin Was Arrested in a Florida Supermarket

Vladimir Putin was arrested at a West Palm Beach supermarket on Monday, CNN reports, but the charges do not, sadly, include espionage. No, this particular Vladimir Putin found screaming at employees at a Publix grocery story was not the former KGB agent turned Russian authoritarian leader. This Vladimir Putin happens to be from the state of Florida.

When police arrived at the scene,Putin told them he had "missed his ride," which CNN wisely points out would never happen to Russia Man Vladimir Putin. Florida Man Vladimir Putin also refused to give his name to police, according to their report, which pretty much makes sense. He was charged with "resisting and/or obstructing an officer without violence."

The whole episode prompts a disturbing question: What if Russia was ruled by a Florida Man? Can you bring your pet gator to the Kremlin?